One of the most important things in life is having a strong sense of self and positive self-worth. If you do not believe in yourself and have low self-esteem it can create huge barriers. How you feel and think about yourself is key to finding peace and happiness.
Yet – loving ourselves is one of the hardest things for people to do. People often find their self-worth shattered into a million little pieces on the floor.
Life can feel incredibly hard when our self-worth is low.
I have talked to countless women over the years that never feel good enough. The theme tends to be universal. I’m not pretty enough, thin enough, sexy enough, curvy enough, smart enough or good enough. And the list goes on and on. I too had a very long list.
We listen to the lies that we tell ourselves and eventually the lies become our truths. The tapes play over and over in our heads and over time it is hard to break the cycle of our self-created pain. Self-sabotage becomes a part of who we are and the belief that we are not enough keeps us stuck.
But there are so many reasons to break that cycle and to find a way to build up your self-esteem.
When you learn to love yourself life feels better. You won’t beat yourself up all the time and accepting ALL of who you are becomes easier. Strong self-worth leads to confidence and you will feel more at peace in your daily life. It is when you can learn to love yourself that you will become less needy and stop feeling so desperate for the validation from others.
In truth self-worth leads to a happier life and the courage to pursue the life you have always wanted.
There are so many reasons why it is important to learn to love yourself and build strong self-worth.
So how do you feel better about who you are and start to believe that you are good enough?
I would like to share 13 powerful reminders that I have discovered for building up my own self-worth over the years.
There will be hard times and yes, sometimes it can feel like you have a really big mountain to climb. However – you can do it. You too can learn to love YOU and believe in yourself.
- Change the conversations you are having with yourself.
Self chatter is constantly a part of who we are and quite honestly the things we tell ourselves can knock us down. Pay attention to the conversations you are having inside of your own head. If you are constantly telling yourself negative things you will eventually believe them. Take note of what you are thinking and shift your thoughts. Stop a negative thought and replace it with a positive one. You will be amazed at how changing your negative thoughts to positive ones can help to improve your self-esteem.
2. Change your environment.
It is easy to feel trapped in life and to feel like we cannot break free of those things that are holding us down. If you are in a situation that is stressful or causing you pain it is important to find the courage to make a change. Sadly, people stay in things far longer than they should because they are afraid to leave or to be alone. Find your strength and take the steps to change your situation. It might feel incredibly hard but it is when you take those steps that you can surround yourself with people and things that make you feel good instead of bad.
3. Live a life of gratitude.
Life is hard but it is important to remember that even when you are feeling bad there is always something to be grateful for. Slow down and take a look around. You might be surprised at how many good things are in your life. If you are struggling to recognize the things you are grateful for make a gratitude list. Write down three things that you are grateful for every day. You will be amazed at how living in gratitude can shift your perspective and help you to feel better about yourself.
4. Live a life of self-appreciation.
It is easy to get stuck in focusing on everything we don’t love about ourselves. Focusing on the negative will sabotage our self-worth fast. YOU matter and I can promise you that there are many positive and wonderful things that make you who you are. Self-awareness is key but try writing about all of the things you love about yourself. It can feel uncomfortable at first but find those things that you like and write them down. Focusing on positive traits can help to build positive self-esteem.
5. Replace your bad habits with good ones.
Everyone has a bad habit or two. However, if you are doing things in life that are standing in the way of your happiness or leave you feeling bad or guilty it is time to make a change. Change is hard but it is possible and I believe anyone can change if they want something bad enough. If you need to make changes find the strength to do it. Set goals but be realistic and take one step at a time. Making positive changes in life can lead to improved self-esteem.
6. Take responsibility.
It is easy to fall into the trap of the blame game. Pointing fingers and making excuses will keep you stuck and can damage your self-worth. Everyone makes mistakes and it is not always about the mistake but rather learning from it and making better choices moving forward. Choosing well and the wisdom that comes from the past can help to improve damaged self-worth. You can live your life playing the role of a victim or you can take control of your destiny and own your story moving forward.
7. Stand back up.
Life’s journey can be challenging and it can be peppered with lots of detours along the way. Sadly, there will be many things that happen in life that can damage our self-worth and knock us down. But remember it is not always what happens to you but what you do with what happens to you. You are stronger than you realize and it is up to you to get back up when you are knocked to the ground. Fighting through the pain instead of letting it run you over can help to build up your self-esteem. You are a survivor and you will be okay.
8. Don’t settle for less than what you deserve.
Sadly, people with low self-worth often settle for less than what they want and deserve in life. They don’t believe they deserve to be loved or happy and are often afraid to be alone. So – they sacrifice their own needs and happiness. Don’t do it. Learning to stand up for yourself and fighting for what is important to you will help to elevate your self-worth. You deserve to be happy. Period.
9. Find your purpose.
One of the most important things in life is finding your life’s purpose. Purpose can give you a reason to get up in the morning and if you are spending time doing things you are passionate about and love you will feel much better about who you are. It is when you can live a life with purpose and passion that you will be much more fulfilled and feel good inside.
10. No one can make you happy.
It is easy to believe that our inner happiness is defined by others. That is a myth. It is impossible to be happy or to love others if we are not first happy and in love with ourselves. Happiness starts from within. Focus on you and what you need to fill your bucket and happiness will follow. Stop waiting around for others to make you happy. It is up to you.
11. Stop comparing yourself to others.
Human beings often waste far too much energy comparing themselves to others and ultimately are never satisfied within themselves. It is important to remember that if you are constantly comparing yourself to others or trying to compete you will end up feeling like you are not good enough. The grass is not always greener on the other side. Focus on you and your strengths. Shift your perspective and start to believe that you are enough just the way you are.
12. Give to others.
Giving to others is a gift to yourself and in the end, doing good deeds in life can fill your heart with joy and improve your self-worth. Go out into the world and make a difference each and every day. It does not have to be big things. Small acts of kindness or helping others will help you to love yourself and to feel good about who you are.
The past can hold great power over our lives and sabotage our self-worth. Living a life filled with guilt and regret will derail you fast. Let go of what was and don’t let the past define you. Learn to forgive yourself and stop beating yourself up. Forgiveness will help you to find peace and to love yourself regardless of the past.
Self-worth is critical to building a solid foundation in life. It is when our self-worth or self-esteem is low that life can fall apart. It is time to stop listening to the lies and throw away your old tapes. You are in control of your life and your thoughts. Take your power back and start to believe in yourself. Pursue your dreams and believe that you CAN do hard things. You deserve to be happy and guess what? YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH.
In Peace and With Love-